"I wonder what being a window would be like?"

"Very panefull"

 What goes haha, bonk?

someone laughing there head off!!  

heres another one:

a judge is walking in the local prison.  He visits each of the cells and asks them why they were there.  They all said they were innocent.  As he came to the last cell, the man said, I'm a thief and deserve to be here. the judge looks at him and says:  I am going to have to remove you, you seem to be the only one here who has committed a crime, and i don't want you setting a bad example to all these good men i have been talking to. :)

 A horse walks into a bar. Bartender asks the horse "Why the long face?"

Get it?  Horse?  Long face?   Hey no one said they had to be GOOD jokes!  Blame my kids for that one.   

 Ok here is one: a pengiun walks into a bar and says, have you seen my brother?  The bartender replies, I don't know, what does he look like?

Ha ha!!  

Termite walks into a bar and says, "Where is the bar tender"?

A man walks into a bar and says, "OW!"

Definition of  a parasite: a person who lives in Paris.

there was a magician oc a cruse ship, and ha did a show evary night. the captain had a parrot who sat on the stage with him. he was always telling the croud what the magician did. squack!!! he put it up his sleeve. squack!!!! he put it under the table.so one day, the magician was tired of the parrot that he pulled a gun and shot at the bird. tthe bird ducked and the bullet hit a ;propane tank and the ship blew up. the only survivors were the magician and the parrot. the parrot said"al right, i give up. weres the ship?

from the blue collar comedy tour one for the road.ron white

One of life's greatest mysteries is how a two pound box of chocolate can make a woman gain five pounds.  

the reason that women over fifty don't have babies is that they would put them down and forget where they left them.