The Lost Art(Lifestyle) of Being A Gentleman...(Final Post)
It is my personal opinion that in this world there is no better way for men to reflect the love and servant heart of Jesus Christ than to practice the art of being a gentleman. We live in a world where men are bombarded through TV, the internet, music, movies, video games, and every kind of media you can imagine. They are encouraged to be rude, crude, and to disrespect and degrade women. We must teach our young men that if we aren’t different from the world, we will never make an impact for Christ, after all, God told us to be in the world, but not to conform to it (Romans 12:2). So, exactly what is a gentleman? I’m glad you asked. God’s word tells us that we will become great when we become as a servant (Mark10:43). A gentleman is a servant-leader. I have come up with a definition that is also a Gentleman’s Creed, his motto if you will; the true essence of a gentleman. All gentlemen inducted into the Official League of Practicing Gentlemen (OLPG) are required to learn this creed, they receive a laminated copy and they are to display it on their refrigerator, on their wall in their room, or in their locker at school to remind them that being a gentleman isn’t a list of things to do, but a lifestyle to live as a servant of Jesus Christ. It is as follows…
"The True Gentleman is the man whose conduct proceeds from his personal relationship with Jesus Christ and a sincere desire to serve others. A true gentleman is self-controlled; does not make anyone aware of inferiority or deformity; who is humble and if need be, will humble another; who does not show off wealth; has a teachable spirit; and does not brag about his own possessions or achievements; who speaks frankly but is always sincere and sympathetic; who does what he says he will do; who thinks of the rights and feelings of others, rather than his own; and can get along with anyone; he is a man whose honor is sacred and virtue safe."
Being a gentleman is not rocket science, however, it is not just a list of good things to do; it is a lifestyle. It is a great way you can relate to people, and when you relate well to people, they will in turn relate well to the Jesus Christ inside you as you reflect Him. Matthew 5:16 is the basis for being a gentleman. “Let your light shine before men in such a way that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father who is in heaven.” Understanding this allows you to understand that being a gentleman is not something you can do to make you feel good; you do it to honor God. It goes back to “those four little words we all love” (Bro. Hollie). “It’s all about Him.” It’s about honoring God by honoring others with your actions.
In understanding why it is important to be a gentleman, we must also understand why our ladies are so very important. God created our ladies in a special way and for a special reason, and as gentlemen we need to understand that. When God was done creating everything, he looked over it all and found one thing missing, ole boy was by himself and didn’t have any help. This wasn’t good (Genesis 2:18). So God created woman as a helpmate to man, and that she is (Genesis 2:22-23). Whenever I look at my wife I must remind myself that she is according to scriptures (2 Corinthians 6:18) a daughter of the King of Kings, that makes her a princess; and she deserves to be treated as such. This includes cherishing what God has given us. However, this does not mean just our wives, fiancés, girlfriends, or female friends. This also includes our mother, sisters, grandmothers, aunts, and cousins, any female that we have a relationship with or come in contact with.
Last time I checked, we’re all here because of our mommas. She carried you for nine months and gave birth to you, for that reason alone she deserves your respect. I don’t care how mean she is or what she has or has not done for you in your life, she is your mother and you should give her your utmost respect. Why, you ask? For one reason and one reason only, she decided to keep feeding you once you got here. Now you’re here, right where God wants you, and He has a special plan for your life
(Jeremiah 29:11) and your mom played a huge part in that. That’s why we should respect our mothers.
Sisters are another important female relationship that is crucial. Why sisters? I’m glad you asked. Sisters, when choosing her husband and your brother-in-law will look to two relationships in her life that will help her make that decision. First, how her father treated and loved her, and second, how her brother treated and loved her. These two relationships are the ones she looks to the most, and believe me, she will. She will be a wife and a mother herself, help her make the Christ-like decision.
Grandmothers, aunts, your mom’s friends, are all female relationships in your life that play a very important role. They help your mom and dad in your overall development as a person, as a Christian, and as a leader. They back up and support you and your parents in your raising, because trust me, they can’t do it all on their own, they need some help.
All these ladies play an important part of who you are and what you will become. For this reason they deserve your respect. They show you the love of Christ; therefore we need to show them the same.
If you want to teach our young men to be gentleman, you(men) must commit to be one yourself. This is one of those things you actually have to live out yourself because it’s something they can all see. They can’t see your quiet time, what you watch at home, or look at on the internet; but they can see this. Practice makes perfect.
For older men who want to get married so badly, and don’t understand why any girls will date them, try this for a while and see if things don’t change. By the way, have you called your mother lately and told her how much you love her and appreciate her. What about a sister you have neglected a relationship with. You’ll never learn to appreciate a gift from God that we call a wife until you learn to appreciate the other women in your life.
Being a gentleman is hard work, but the concept is simple. It’s all about being a servant leader and reflecting the love of Christ. You do that through relationships, and that will be a lot easier to do that when you learn The Lost Art of Being a Gentleman.