BJ Not BK

The President gave an emotionally charged and impassioned speech last night asking both parties to put aside bickering and to push through his health-care reform proposal.  I say emotions smotions...let's look at this rationally and approach this with a clear, straightforward, no nonsense common sense approach.

How?  Glad you asked.  

Here are the Three "R's" of my health-care reform plan.  Reduce, Reuse or "re-purpose", and recycle.

Reduce, re-purpose, and recycle - if you have ever been to the Dr. you know that there is massive amounts of waste in the system.  The first thing we have to do is reduce waste, reduce fraud, and reduce cost.  I am proposing a three pronged approach to reducing these three key areas as follows: 

          1. To reduce Fraud - put in place a pre-examination examination Dr.s panel made up of qualified, that's relative right?, nurses and Dr.s who will see you before you see the Dr or your choice to determine if you really need to see a Dr.  The cost will be a flat rate of $1000.00 per visit and will be put into place to weed out any undesirables who would attempt to scam the system with puny symptoms such as hacking, sneezing, or sucking chest wounds.  Oh, I would also make sure that the standard wait time would average 6.2 days and that the lobby be equipped only with the most boring out of date magazines and painfully uncomfortable furniture available on the black market today. 

          2.  To reduce Cost - begin by sourcing supplies from "low cost providers."  Recently when our family welcomed our new baby I noticed that normal, everyday items such as aspirins and band-aids where very very expensive.  Aspirins $12.00 each, Band-aids, $7.50 each, Neosporin, $75.00 per tube.  I know this lady at the Sevier County Flea Market, Delores, she is there every Saturday and she always has an assortment of medical supplies.  I once saw a bottle of aspirin for $2.00.  An entire bottle of 200 ct aspirin for $2.00 that is less than .01 cents per aspirin!  That's a 1,200% reduction in cost and this is just one example.

          3.  To reduce Waste - begin by re-purposing previously owned items.  Take a page from the Cheryl Crowe playbook and begin using both sides of the bandage, recycle wheel chairs and prosthetic limbs. 

          4.  Re-introduce tried and true medical processes and procedures.  Whatever happened to a bottle of cheap tequila and a stick?  The ever popular do it yourself home vasectomy kit?

My question is ask not what your health-care provider can do for me but what can I do for my health-care provider.  

My simple, straight forward proposal was crafted in under 15 minutes, now mind you I understand it is under the power of my genius and a strong cup of coffee, but if I can craft such a wonderful solution surely Congress can do the same?

Just for your enjoyment a song to go along with my reform...